


Christmas Break

by Screaming_into_the_endlessvoid



Series: Regan-19 [2]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: 2020 Global Pandemic Outbreak, Alternate Universe - No Zombie Apocalypse, Christmas Fluff, Dad!Negan, Eventual Smut, Family, Highschool Carl, How Do I Tag, Humor, Light-Hearted, M/M, Mild Language, One Big Happy Family, Online School, Quarantine, Romance, Teacher Negan (Walking Dead), Wear a Mask Please
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2021-01-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:08:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 17,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28141389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Screaming_into_the_endlessvoid/pseuds/Screaming_into_the_endlessvoid
Summary: A story in which Rick and Negan are together and it's Christmas break, Corona is happening, Carl's doing online school, Rick is still at work at the department, Judith being an energetic 3 year old, and Negan being a stay at home gym teacher, (Yes it possible look it up.), it's just family fluff and bodning through this atrocious pandemic.
Relationships: Carl Grimes & Negan, Judith Grimes & Negan, Rick Grimes/Negan
Series: Regan-19 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2117514
Comments: 27
Kudos: 25





	1. Midnight Grind

**Author's Note:**

> Hi this is my first fic on here. I just wanted to post a fic handling this ship on the current pandemic. Plus it's Christmas break for me so yes, I may have lightly put my life into this.  
> Its fine. Its okay. :) It's still cute.

Carl was in his room at 11 PM currently typing away on his computer. Online school work had been overkill at this point. I mean the world is in shambles and people are dying, there's a worldwide pandemic going on. Why is school the number one priority still? He was barely keeping up with his algebra grade. 'Stupid Algebra' he thought, 'who's going to bust open a calculator and start solving irrelevant ass math equations on a side walk'. The only thing that's been helping him nowadays was Mathway and his class group chat for the answers. He didn't have to worry though, Winter Break was 2 days away, finishing the rest of this semester. He laughed out loud to himself just thinking how his dad was going to flip his shit at his 1st quarter grades.  


While tapping on his keyboard mindlessly, he heard a knock on his door, indicating that someone was still awake at this hour of the night. His door opened and he saw Negan peek his head in. "Carl? What the hell are you still doing up?" he asked. He saw a light emanating from under Carl's door on his way back from the bathroom.

"I'm doing my dumbass Algebra homework" Carl answers. Since Negan's and Rick's 7 months relationship, Negan has always been the cooler lenient parent and has actually encouraged Carl to let loose with words "Hell they're just words" he had once said. Carl shuddered after realizing he had referred to Negan as a parent. 'Don't want to think about my gym teacher like that. Shut that shit down' He thought.

It's not that he didn't like him, in fact deep down he had grown quite fond of Negan, (he would never admit it of course), but him being his other dad was just too weird to think about...especially since he's still his gym teacher. But in a way, it was still nice that he got to be this comfortable around Negan. His dad would be having spazzes if he talked around him like he did with Negan, Carl laughed to himself.  


Negan came in, dressed in only a wife beater that stuck excellently to his muscled defined torso and his black boxer shorts. Being a highschool gym teacher was his job after all, and the thought of him teaching kids the proper way to a life of healthy physical well being and fitness while not looking like the definition just did not sit well with him, as if he'd not only be lying to himself but to the kids as well. "You been using that website I gave you, for answers and shit?" He asked coming over to look at Carl's progress, lord knows he did not even touch an ounce of his school work back in his days. He thought he could help make Carl's already problematic teenage life a little easier. "Been using it ever since I started, I swear Negan it's like they fucking expect us to do some NASA spacecraft algorithm bullshit after we graduate, I mean this is only a highschool average junior algebra class, there's no reason why it should be this fucking complicated" Carl expressed, irritation radiating off his entire body. Negan laughed, finding Carl's words were absolutely true in all senses. 

The kids were only 16, 17 hell some of em were 15, and they were expected such high expectations of testing every week over bullshit material they were most likely going to forget over the course of their lives. "Hey man, I've been asking the same fucking shit ever since I was your damn age" Negan said through his amusement. "I would definitely go back in time and put a bullet through the dipshit who even came up with the idea of math" Negan laughed, giving his rabbit tooth grinned. "They don't even deserve instant death, they deserve the most excruciating sadistic torture ever brought up in all man's history." Carl stated darkly, his eyes growing dark as he thought absently of the thought of it. A sick sort of smirk appeared on his face, "Shit kid, you are a hell of a little serial killer, you know that?" Negan asked shocked at Carl's dark words. There was such intensity behind every word he had said. 'Damn he could seriously kill somebody, if they ever fuck with him the wrong way, damn lunatic' Negan internalized looking at Carl in a thoughtful way.  
"Let's just hope we don't ever get there" Carl said, although he was being serious he ended up laughing at the end of his sentence, Negan laughed with him. As fucked up as it was, it apparently made them laugh harder, knowing that Carl holds the potential to be murderer. Crazy. 

After they caught their breaths, Negan had placed his hand on Carl's head, ruffling his hair, it was getting pretty long but not long enough to hang down yet. "Augh- Negan you know I hate it when you do that shit.." Carl groaned his hands pushing Negan's from the top of his dome. Negan grinned, rabbit teeth and all "Yeah kid, I know. Just try not to overwork yourself tonight school ends in 2 days, you don't want to be drained for the rest of fucking break do ya?" "No I'd rather not, After I submit this answer I'll be on my last problem and go to bed after I finish that" Carl said reaching his last question, Negan walked over to the door "Good, unhealthy sleeping patterns and sleep deprivation is not good for your physique, health, or mindset kid" Negan said turning back to him.  


Carl rolled his eyes earning a chuckle from Negan. "Yeah thanks." He said absently. "Hey I'm just fucking looking out for ya, you don't want to be 31 years old struggling with fucking noodle arms and baggy ass eyes and joint pains. " Negan said "Yeah I guess not, thanks Negan" Carl said appreciating Negan's concern for his health, it made him feel something he did not want to get into yet. "Of fucking course, good night kid" Negan said making his exit, "Good fucking night Negan" Carl said called out to him. Though the door was closed, he could hear Negan laugh at his use of profanity "Fuck me, that kid is something else" Negan said to himself, walking back to his and Rick's room for the night.  


Carl finished his last question and closed his computer. Putting it on his night stand and giving it one last "Fuck you" with his middle finger for the night, he laid down and closed his eyes. He was like out like a light in less than 3 seconds.


	2. Good Morning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, before you read I just wanted to say Thank You to everyone who read and liked this. I had a mental breakdown a couple days before I wrote the first chapter for this last night XD and now I'm feeling better about this, don't get me wrong I'm still shy as hell, but to those of who read THANK YOU!!!! <3 it really means a lot to me.

Carl was having a weird dream where he was sitting in a room of 4 walls, at a white toy table that was barely illuminated by an overhead lamp. The bulb was flickering on and off, and the room looked like a child's little play area, but the scene made him feel like he was in a horror movie. There were 2 pink model chairs, the one he was sitting in and the one that was directly across from him. On the table were pink antique tea cups, and a kettle; the floor was scattered with little toy dolls and ragdolls, some of which had looked liked the ones Judith had in her hands all the time. In front of him a shadow was moving, and had finally taken the unoccupied seat in front of him. 'What. The. Fuck. is going on?' Carl had thought, confusion fear and irony all waging a battle in his body.

" _Hello Carl, I've been waiting for you._ " The ever hidden presence spoke, it had 2 voices, one high in pitch as if it were human, and the other low as if it were demonic or some evil creature from the pits of hell. The lamp light stopped flickering, instead rising with brightness, and he could make out the ominous dark entity in front of him as Judith. She was wearing a cute little blue dress, the one's you would normally see on doll figures. Fear sparked through him, but not as much as the confusion that had grown 10 folds inside him. "Judy? What the _hell_ is going on?" he asked incredulously, " _Hush dearest brother, for we shall not speak, It's time to partake in the Tea_ " the entity embodied as Judith spoke, Carl refused to believe that was his little sister. She raised her hand flat in the air, hovering over the empty cup in front of her, Carl watched on as he saw the cups slowly fill with a darkish brown liquid. He had realized that Judith was holding something. It looked like a male Barbie doll, Carl inspected it closer. 'Wait hold on, that looks like dad' Carl thought.

In fact it was true, the doll Judith had in her left arm was in fact a doll version Rick Grimes, sheriff uniform, police hat, and all. It had piercing blue eyes and it's jaw was colored a blackish dark color, symbolizing his beard. Carl lost his shit. "Judy..wha-what is this?" he asked completely dumbfounded " _Silly Carl, I already told you. We are having a Tea Party_ " that twisted voice said, amusement behind it this time. Just as Judith started taking a sip of her cup the doll version Rick turned it's head and looked at Carl. Carl gawked, panic swallowed him whole now. "Carl, it's time to get up" The doll said, it's plastic lips moving with the words it spoke. Carl blinked on as he was now at this point lost for good. The Rick doll continued staring at him, after a moment it made an irritated face "Get up son" it said again. Carl looked around as if that was the reasonable response to it's growing irritation. After coming back to look at the plastic face of his dad, it was now mad this time. " ** _Carl_** wake UP"

Carl jolted awake. Breathe uneven, and heart pounding in his chest. He looked around, he was in his room, he had closed his eyes and let out a deep breath after that revelation opening his eyes again after being alerted to the sound of someone's breathing. He looked at his door and saw his dad giving him a look that had verbally expressed ' _what the fuck is wrong with_ _you?_ ' without any words. He laughed awkwardly "Morning Dad" Carl said flashing him a weird smile that looked like he was gassy. Rick looked perplexed on all accounts. "Carl are you alright?" he asked in his southern drawl. "I'm doing well yeah, how 'bout you?" Carl said, not trying to have a conversation with Rick about how he had a dream where Judith was some possessed little live version marionette who was doll crazed and only set on having toys and horrific tea parties and -quite literally- having Rick in her fingertips. The more he thought about it the more funnier it was, 'dreams are so weird', he smiled to himself. When he noticed the room had gone quiet, he looked back at Rick lost. "What?" he asked, "It's 11:35, you missed Breakfast, are you feeling okay Carl, Negan told me you were up till midnight last night, doing your algebra. I just wanted to see if you needed anything or was feelin sick or somethin." Rick had said, Why was it so hard to talk to teenagers? After his adolescent stage, it seemed Carl only got more and more confusing to him, like sometimes he was a whole 'nother stranger living in his house. 

"Dad I'm fine, I just had a weird dream that's it. I promise it's not as deep as you're making it out to be" Carl sighed, getting up from bed. Rick noticed he was getting annoyed at his parental display of concern and if he pushed him far he would just end up pissing him off more than he ever intended too. " Well alright, just know I'll always be here for you if you need me. I love you" He said "Yeah Dad, I know, I love you too, now if you don't mind I need to use the bathroom" Carl said walking over in front of him. Rick studied his son a little bit and had finally moved so Carl could get through. Making his way downstairs, Rick heard the shower in the bathroom start running, indicating that Carl was taking a shower. He walked into the kitchen grabbing a glass of water, he felt Negan's gaze on him, and finally looked over in his direction. He was at the table, helping clean Judith after she grew tired of eating her food, and more fond of playing with it. "He up?" Negan asked after getting Judith down from her highchair, he watched her run over to the living room, enjoying her show of Peppa Pig. "Yeah, he's taking a shower now. Why are kids so difficult?" Rick inquired. Negan laughed at that, "Damn Rick, how would you like it if you just woke up and were forced to make conversation right afterwards?" "Negan I honestly don't know how that little boy could grow into that stranger upstairs in my bathroom, it's like they are so different, I'd forget he was my son if it weren't for his eyes." Rick stated.

"Damn baby blues, gotta love 'em" Negan commented, walking over giving Rick some sort of of filthy smirk of his that had Rick's face heating up. "Honestly baby, it's not as big as you think it is. Carl had to grow eventually -shit, Judith will grow and we can't expect them to be the same sweet little shortcake they were while their growing, that'd be very fucking selfish. We have to be there for them, support them, raise them, and help them the best way we can. Yeah you may have lost that little boy, but now you get to have new one, who's older and more pronounced than the one before him. He may be a stranger but the best part is that you get to meet him all over again." Negan looked off a little confused, turning back to Rick with a sheepish grin, "Does that make sense?" "Yeah, yeah, it does. Since when did you get so good at kids for a man who doesn't have any." Rick says actually amazed at Negan's wisdom for his inexperience. Negan gave a genuine laugh, "Rick your lack of faith in me wounds me" he says, exaggerating his hand over his heart and frowning. Rick rolls his eyes "Alright you sad sob, kiss me goodbye so I can leave" he says, closing the distance between them. Their lips collide. Tongue dancing against tongue, Negan taking the lead- per usual- as he does that thing with his tongue over the top of Rick's mouth that gets him every time. Getting a bit more intimate, Rick's hands come to rest over Negan's shoulders and Negan taking an arm around the small of Rick's back and pressing their bodies flush against, both were getting dizzy and light-headed. Pulling away and taking their time getting the air that they lost to each other, " _Damn_ baby blues" Negan exclaimed, smirk at the backbone of his words. Rick gave him a quick kiss before pulling away, "'damn' yourself Negan" Rick said with a wink. He walked over to get his keys, and his mask, then over to Judith, "Bye sweetie I'll see you later today ok?" he said bending down giving her a hug. "BYE DADDY!!!" she screamed, squeezing him tightly. He walked to the door giving Negan one more look "Love you." he said, "Love you more baby" Negan said, his tone soft with real affection. And with that Rick closed, the yellow doors and was on his way to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT TOOK ME 4 HOURS WRITING THIS OML!!!!!! It's so funny because I started at 6 and ended at 10 xD. Anywyas fro those of you wondering I'll be posting at night seeing as the fact that I get more...'creative' in the night than I am in the day, sorry for making y'all wait. But thank you so much for reading. <3


	3. Hot Chocolate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> '...I only post at night...'  
> Yall: "This you?"  
> Me: no sight eyes empty 🙈  
> Don't come for me I just thought about this chapter and went with it.  
> I did and will continue to do this for this story because I am flawless. *mwah*  
> Oh and I know y'all are wondering when Rick and Negan are going to bang and it's coming there dont worry. <3 Thanks for keeping up with my craziness.

Negan was working at at his computer set in the small area in the living room he had put together at the start of this school year.

Maintaning his class while keeping an eye on Judith, was fairly simple to accomplish, seeing as she is an absolute ANGEL and is content with just staring at the telvesion all throughout the day.

He thought about that last part of that sentence, cringing to himself that toddlers shouldn't be in front of T.V. all day, but it's not that big of a deal as other things for them, besides the shows she watch are all helping her educational skills before she went into kindergarten.

' _It's fine. It's good_ '. he thought dismissing the uncertainty of bad parenting.

Negan was sitting there, glasses and all, grading his students written papers on the ' _importance of physical maintenance and healthy eating habits for the body_ ' when he heard Carl come downstairs.

"Hey kid, you sleep alright?" He asks, trying to start some sort of verbal interaction with him.

Carl shrugs, walking over into the kicthen with a soft smile that pressed his lips. "My dream was suspposed to be some horrific nightmare but it was failing miserably at." He responded, humor lining the back of his tone. 

Negan laughed in response. 

He didn't want to push him farther and press him with questions about it, understanding that teenagers just like being alone.

Carl came into the living room sitting on the couch texting on his phone. Judith laughed at the show she was watching. Some kind of mermaid kids living underwater teaching school to the 4th wall while dancing and singing, Negan couldnt tell. Children shows were all scary to him if he was being honest.

He was reading one of his students responses, blown away that the kid was acing it in every area.

"... _physical activity must be included throughout our lives or else the effects of stagnat, unresponsive laziness will start killing our bodies slowly but surely over a process of time, to the point where there might be some serious health issues, that could've been avoided if we taken the time to nourish our bodies and build it like the strong temple it was meant to be. With a good vital healthy eating system and balanced workout routine, everyone can live_ _more than a couple more decades on Earth."_

'Fuck that was good.' Negan thought, blown away by the repsonse of this kid. 

Out of nowhere, an ever growing suspension crept over him, starting in the back of his mind, then spreading to the forfront of his brain

Moving the cursor and selecting a sentence, pressing the 'ctrl + c'. He took to the internet of what he suspected was to be a plagiarized sentence. Coming up in the search results, were the exact word for word statement, from an article of gym fitness.

" _Motherfuck-_ " Negan cut himself off in the air, switching so fast over to the tab where he was reading the paper. 

" _ **F**_ " " _The next time you feel like plagiarizing, make sure you CHANGE your words to make sure it doesnt look exactly like what it says in the results"_ Negan typed. 

Carl looked over at him from his phone screen with a curious gaze.

"Some prick just plagiarized and I caught there ass red-handed, I knew it was too good to be a legitmate response. I mean this is gym class." Negan explained. Carl laughed at his statement. It was just a gym class, who would go out there way for that. 

During the mix it had started to snow outside, Negan hadn't notice until Judith screamed "IT'S SNOWING NEGAN!!!" Her face lighting up with so much amazement.

Bless that child. She was adorable as a sleeping newborn puppy. Even more so.

Deciding now would be a good time to take a break, Negan closed his computer and went over to look at the window. Light flurries of little white dots began to gracefully drop down, clashing with the dark colors of objects, trees and houses. This would be a perfect time for a cliché type of thing...

"Who wants some hot chocolate?" Negan said turning to smile at them both. With his glasses still own it gave him a parternal vibe to him. -he also looked dorky too-

*gasp* "MEE!!!!!" Judith screamed, happy once again.

Carl sighed but gave a short "sure" in response.

Teenagers. Gotta love 'em. 

Walking over to the kitchen grabbing the packets, mugs and whip cream. Negan boiled the water. Looking over to the stove he read the time.

1:43 PM

His thoughts turned over to Rick, and what he was doing right now. Probably doing paperwork and cop stuff.. 'I should text him' Negan thought grabbing his phone off his desk. 

_1:43 PM_

_hey baby, i want to tell u how fuckin sexy u look when i get you blushin r gettin all flustered by the way i fuck with you. makes me want to dick you down hard and rough, make you really get embarrased by my filthy mouth when i have you cummin from my cock ;)_

**1:46 PM**

**Negan...I'm at work...you can't just text me shit like that while I'm at work...**

Negan smirked an evil grin.

_1:47 PM_

_i wonder how red u'd get_ _...specially if i fucked u right over that cute lil desk of urs in that damn station. Have you beeting redder than that Giant Ginger Fuck himself._

**1:50 PM**

**Leave Abraham out of this. Poor soul does not deserve the way you're metaphorically using him in that sentence. As for that other bit... that is it. that is my reply. Just: '...'**

_1:52 PM_

_cmon baby i want sexy time!!!!!!! been dying of fuckin blue balls for 3 FUCKIN WEEKS Rick Grimes. u sir, are a bad guy :((_

Negan readied the hot chocolate for the three of them, adding whip cream and a light sprinkle of cinammon to the top. He called Judith and Carl over to grab their cups. "You already know it's hot, emphasis on it's name" he said warning them. "Duh" Carl replied rolling his eyes. Judith was blowing her mug, that little girl had a set of lungs herself, blowing on the mug as if it were one of those difficult birthday candles, the ones that never fucking out no matter how hard you blew.

Checking his phone- 

**1:53 PM**

**Maybe if you're good Negan...**

Oh, little tease was going to play with him like that huh?

_1:57 PM_

_u know how i get when you tease me rickie. tyat should be a warning itself._

**2:09 PM**

**that***

**Maybe I'm feeling frisky 'insert winkie face'**

_2:10 PM_

_LMFAO u did not. ur playing a dangerous game rickie boy._

**2:12 PM**

**I did and I know 😈 I have to go Negan but this isn't finished till I have you tellin me how 'fuckin tight and hot' I am around you. bye babe :^)**

Negan gulped

Even the child's show playing in the background couldn't help get rid of the tightness in his pants.


	4. Chicken Alfredo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so sorry for leaving y'all to ponder 😞 i just got sad and lonely and when i'm sad and lonely i make angst...and we don't want that in a light hearted story.  
> Anyways I'll be posting another chapter tomorrow probably Early. because y'all deserve it. And if you're new here thank you for reading. ❤ love you all.

Rick could not wait to go home.

The station had been busy today.

They got an anonymous tip off that there was something going on at the Anderson's residence. He and Abraham, (to his embrassment because of Negan's dirty comments about him), went on the scene. 

While there, they found Jessie Anderson cupping a her cheek which had a sharp red burning hand print that had imprinted, her eyes red puffy and her face splotched. It was already unspoken how she had been hit by the drunkened bastard who was passed out on the couch, beer bottle in hand spilling over onto the floor.

Abraham had easily apprehended Pete, he was in no physical state to put up much of a fight while being so intoxicated.

Rick had gathered information about what was going on from Jessie, and had comforted her with warm words that spoke truth about how that monster would not hurt her again. After making sure she felt better and was more comfortable he left.

Reporting to Hershel, the Sheriff, filing paperwork, debriefing, and making account on the information shared to him from Jessie had wore him out. When he had finished it was around 8 PM. 

The darkness had completley engulfed the snowy late winter night. The cold wafting through him, making his teeth clatter as he walked to his car, it had only made him feel more sad and more empty for Jessie. She does not deserve to go through what she had to go through. 

Apparently she had been going to counseling to deal with Pete's abusive shitty bullshit for the past year or so, but since this damn pandemic, she was stuck there, attending to both her children and that bastard.

His heart broke some more.

He got home at 8:20 PM. Opening the yellow door to his home, he was greeted with the smell of something delicious. Negan had cooked dinner. 

Taking his mask off, sanitizing his hands hands twice, and finally stepping out of his boots and coat, he walked into in the living. 

They were placed on the couch watching The Nightmare Before Christmas. Judith was wearing her Disney night gown, snuggled closely into Carl's arm who was wearing a baggy black long sleeve shirt and flannel pajama bottoms. Negan had on his black wife beater and dressed in his gray sweats.

"Hi loves" Rick smiled, a warm feeling coursing through him as he took in the sight of them being domestic.

"Hi Dad!!" " **DADDY!!!** " "Hi Baby" 

They all jumped from the couch and tackled Rick. Laughing he had squeezed them all in return, trying to get his balance back from being pounced on the floor.

"How was work?" Negan asked him, helping him up from the floor after they got off of him, placing a tender kiss to his lips. 

Carl gagged in disgust.

"Exhausting" Rick sighed.

"Oh damn, what happened?" Negan asked him, concern lacing his features. 

"I'll tell you about it over dinner, lemme change real quick." Rick said going into his bedroom. 

Stripping off his uniform, he had put some black sweats on, and a White shirt that was Negan's. It swallowed him as it hung off his arms and bottom of his torso. 

Walking into the kitchen he saw everybody at the table plates served. Chicken Alfredo. His absolute favorite.

Negan looked at him and then his shirt.

"I just knew you couldn't get enough of me" He teased him, giving his signature tongue in teeth dirty grin. 

"Keep dreaming" Rick said laughing away his attempts to get him hot and heated.

They discussed how their days went. Hie Negan busted kid plagiarizing and how Rick had been on damage control for Jessie after they taken her abusive husband into lock up. Even though there wasn't much to talk about the atmosphere was still warm. 

They finshed, Negan had gone to put Judith away for the night, and Carl saying his goodnight as he climbed up the stairs.

* * *

Rick started on gathering the dishes and running dish water. He was halfway complete when he he felt something hard press into the small of his back and hot breath on the back of his neck and had jumped not expecting that sort of response from Negan as he was doing his task.

"Shit baby, you're so fucking cute when you get all jumpy" Negan said, his voice rough and low and right in his left ear. He started placing kisses on the back of his neck. Nibbling here and there. 

Rick breathed out a low moan, "Fuck Negan." Dropping the plate in his hand and quickly wiping his hands on the towel, he turned, face to face with Negan.

Negan was wearing this look like he was hungry and Rick was the only thing in front of he was set on eating.

"Rick baby, you know I've been dying of fucking blue balls here for the last 21 days, you've been too." Negan stated.

"I know, and I'm sorry. The station's been getting more and more chaotic Negan. But I'm here now" Rick said cupping his hand against Negan's cheek. 

"You have no idea how bad I've been wanting you. _No idea_. I literally think about you _on_ me, _in_ of me, all throughout the day that it's become a literal need instead of a want." Rick said, locking his eyes with Negan's, letting him see how sincere every word he let out was.

"Negan, _please_ I need you. So much. _Please._ " he begged. 

Negan let out a deep groan that Rick had felt throughout his entire body, especially his penis. Eliciting a slow build of pressure that started at the base and had eventually reached the tip, he was hard within seconds.

Negan crushed their bodies together, Rick let out a deep moan as he felt them melt into one another. 

"Shh baby, shh. It's okay. I got you." He reassured Rick. There was something that had lined his voice that had made it softer that Rick couldn't quite place on it. He didn't have time to think about it as Negan attacked his mouth with his own. Moaning into it, Negan took no time to shove his tongue into Rick's mouth. They both became lightheaded while rutting against eachother. Rick's moans turned into pants as he was trying to get oxygen that he was loosing by the minute to Negan. Negan took the hint and pulled off. 

"I'm gonna make you feel so fucking good baby, I'm going to have you practically seeing heaven on my dick. You're really going to ascending as I fuck you into those sheets baby." Negan grunted. Turning his attention to Rick's neck. He began kissng, then kisses turned into sucking, and sucking turned into bitting. His hands traveled from hips, up his sides, up his back, around his shoulders until they finally found their place at Rick's round soft globes. He gave them a hard squeezed hearing Rick moan and shake in response from Negan's assualt on his body.

"Nnh-Negan" he gasped out. Holding onto Negan's neck to support his legs from crashing out from under him. Negan groaned again, Rick had no idea the effect he had on Negan. He was slowly loosing himself more and more by the sweet pretty sounds that came out from him.

" _Fuck_ baby." Negan said. 

He picked Rick up, and Rick instantly caught on as he wrapped his legs around Negan's waist.

Carrying him to their bedroom, bumping into things on the way there, too distracted to care as their tongues were in a heated battle with one another.

Once Negan closed the door and had placed Rick harshly on the bed, they began to take their clothes off, like frantic hormonal raged induced teenagers.

Rick had admired Negan's torso, scanning his eyes over his well defined muscles, and well stood out pecs and abs, before his eyes started drifting downwards. Following the happy trail of soft dark hair that led to Negan's rock hard cock. Rick's mouth salivated as he stared on. The perfect glorious organ between Negan's legs. 8 inches, flushed a deep pink at the tip, glistening out with liquid want. 

" _Fuuck_ Negan" Rick moaned looking back at the man in front of him, looking to see Negan's face darkened with lust. His hazel eyes having turned darker from the arousal that swarmed him. 

"I'm going to _break you._ " Negan said, his voice was so deep, so rough it had caused an involantary shiver to run up his spine as he meant the words with unprecendented amounts of seriousness. 

Negan climbed on the bed, placing kisses on Rick's body. "Baby you're so fuckin' pretty. So fuckin' beautiful, I'm so happy I get to see you like this, all vulnerable, all for me. And **NOONE** else" he growled, still in that same voice.

Another shiver.

Traveling his way down, his tongue picking up where his lips left out. He stopped when he reached his naval. Looking up, he made eye contact with Rick. 

He continued looking at him, as he diped his head lower and lower before he began to place kisses on his shaft. "Oh fuck-" he choked out. His dick was by now swollen, never gone flaccid from them in the kitchen. 

Watching Negan dip down to his take his balls, he continued looking. He grew tired as he realized Negan was teasing him. He went in to take Rick in his mouth but at the last minute he smirked and licked a slow tormenting path up from his base to his tip. Rick threw his head back and whimpered in frustration.

"Next time you decide to tease me over text, try to remember that I can play that game twice as better than you" Negan smirked, he sounded so conceited. Rick felt tears gather in his eyes as Negan continued to torture him. 

_"Negan. Pleeasee!!"_ He whined, his voice tanged with need as he wanted so badly for Negan to stop toying with him. 

Negan gave a menacing laugh. 

"I love it when you beg baby, makes me really swell with pride knowing how I'm making you my bitch. Not that you aren't already." He teased him more, but Rick was far to gone now to give a damn about it. 

Rick locked eyes with him, but this time the silent threat did not go unoticed by Negan, as he saw Rick was two seconds away from cutting his throat if he continued, he gave a selfish chuckle. "Ok, okay I'll give you want you want" 

Rick had no time to catch his breath as Negan's hot wet cavern engulfed him. 

" _Ohhh_ FUKKKK" Rick threw his head back, grabbing a pillow to muffle his cries. He felt Negan vibrate around him, realizing he was laughing at him. He breathed out slowly and harsh, everytime Negan had went down and swallowed around him, he found that his breath was being stolen away from him everytime he even tried to calm himself. 

Negan had released him with a loud wet pop. 

Rick looked at him, still warn out. 

"I'm going to fuck you now." Negan said, he jad a way of saying the most profound things with something that didn't make it embarassing or awkward. 

He grabbed the lube, squirting a generous amount into his hand before placing it back onto the nightstand.

He had gave himself a few nice strokes, biting his lips to stifle a moan. Turning back to Rick.

He moved so he was on top of him, gazing into his blue orbs finding nothing but hindered lust and desire like his. Placing either hand on Rick's legs, spreading them apart. He pushed in.

It was so hard for Rick to not to scream out loud in response to not being streched properly first to accomodate him. But like Negan said, he was going to break him.

Negan was pressed to the hilt inside him, giving Rick some time to adjust. He was breathing hard, sweating, eyes wavering in response to being filled like this. He loved seeing him completely ravished, especially by him.

After taking a few moments to breathe and calm down, Rick gave him a shaky nod, biting his lip. He looked completely wrecked. Negan leaned up to kiss him and he was met with a more forceful response with Rick's tongue. He began moving.

It was slow at first, but then turned fast. Rick was moaning gripping the sheets, looking at Negan. Cheeks flushed red. He was shaking as he was being torn apart by the same thing that was rebuilding him piece by piece. He loved it.

Once Negan had snapped at the right angle, Rick's head was thrown back and he closed his eyes as Negan had hit his prostate. Negan chuckled. "Fuck yeah, there we go." He said, smugly. 

His hands rested Rick's legs over his bare shoulders then went to grab Rick's chin. Forcing him to open his eyes at the assertive tug on his face.

Negan looked at him pissed.

"Don't look away from me again. I want to see you, as I fucking destroy you. Every. Bit." He said gravely. His hand went to tweak one of Rick nipple's as Rick finally lost his battle on trying to stay quiet, he let out a loud whine of pleasure. 

"Yeah baby, fill the whole damn house with your beautiful noises. Let Carl hear how his daddy is being completely dominated, how he's getting dicked down so hard, so rough right now, by his gym teacher. In fact fill this whole damn neighborhood with those lovely screams baby." Negan encouraged. He picked up even more speed, hitting against his prostate with every thrust, his moans turned into incoherent babbel and cries of pleasure the only thing Negan could make out is " _it's so big Negan, you're so big_ "

"Fuck yeah baby, and you love it don't you?" He asked right in Rick's ear. "Yeah Negan, yes I fucking love it" Rick moaned.

He sounded somewhat like one of those excessive over the top porn stars.

"Yeah baby, you sound so filthy. Take it." He growled at as he began the final stretch, pounding relentlessly into Rick, picking up more speed, more force, and more power. 

The bed was rocking so hard against the wall now, he was sure Carl knew exactly what they were doing if he couldn't hear Rick's cheap porn star moans.

Negan had looked down seeing Rick's now neglected cock throbbing, beet dark red, swollen. He mentally kicked himself, he forgot Rick hadn't gotten off too in 3 weeks somewhere along the lines of fucking Rick senseless. 

"Sorry baby." He apologized looking back up to Rick who was too busy, too busy, seeing stars, he was there physically, looking at Negan, but mentally he was well beyond any coherent understanding of reality.

Negan grabbed his dick, watching as it leaked out with strings of precum. 'Fuck he's so damn hot.' Negan began stroking him in time with his thrust he kept up. 

He felt Rick's walls tremble and tighten around him. He kissed, "You better cover my fucking chest with your cum baby." He whispered in his ear before pulling away. Rick let out a hoarse, rough wail of pleasure before cumming into Negan's hand and shooting onto Negan's chest.

Negan gave one last final thrust, pushing hard and deep into Rick, throbbing as he spilled into Rick. Hot and wet. 

He looked to see Rick's fucked out exhausted face. "I love you so fucking much." Negan sighed, breathing into his neck. "I fucking love you too" his raspy voice replied.

Negan pulled out, using the last of his energy to clean Rick and himself off, and flip them so that Rick was resting on him and pulled the covers to cover them both as the cold air washed over them.

"I saw God."

"I fuckin' told you you would. Don't know what else you'd damn well exptect otherwise Grimes" Negan said arrogantly giving him his rabbit tooth grinned. "Fuck you Negan" Rick laughed

"As much as I'd love to go round two, I am completley exhausted Rick." 

"Mm" Rick sighed content. 

They both drifted off to sleep in eachother's warm embrace for the night. 

Unaware that Carl had in fact heard them. 

And was crying because of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Carl😞  
> Anyways i hope you enjoyed the next chapter will be really funny💖


	5. Trauma

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was just ✨ H U R T ✨  
> & ✨ T R A U M A T I Z E D ✨  
> ✨ D I S G U S T E D ✨  
> That's Carl in this chapter. Enjoy 🥴

Carl was on his phone listening to Gorillaz at 11:47 PM.

He was in his own little bubble until he heard what he thought sounded like his Dad in pain. 

He paused his song - Empire Ants- as he listened out to see if he was just hearing things. 

"..." it was just only his mind he thought.

Putting his earbuds in and about to continue his music he was interupted by what he could confirm was in fact his father. He was right the first time. 

Some sort of fear swirled inside him, 'is he hurt? Why the hell is he making that noise? What's going on?!' He had thought to himself, worrying if his dad was getting killed.

" _Fuck yeah baby_ " is what he heard in in the distinct distance. That was Negan's voice.

'What are they do-... _**wait**_ ' 

Carl had finally connected the dots. He felt ill, his dad and Negan were fucking at 11:47 PM.

There were no words to describe how uncomfortable he felt in this moment. 

'Oh. My. God.' He thought flabberghasted. The fear never going away, he was caught in the void but was pulled back out when he heard the unmistakable creaking of the bed, and the banging noise hitting the walls. 

He was so disturbed. He wanted to leave his body and be somewhere far far away from here. 

He was still scared.

He was shocked beyond words, frozen with fear, and was barely able to register that he was now crying as he felt tears slip down his face. 

Deciding that that was the straw he continued his song, blasting it. Sure it would probably famage his ears but he gave no fucks in the moment, wanting to so badly escape this unbearbly embarrassing shameful experience. He forced himself to go to sleep, music still blaring. Pillow on his head. 

He didn't get a good sleep at all.

* * *

Waking up he went to do his regular morning business, take a leak, brush his teeth, and wash his face. 

On his way downstairs he saw them, in the kitchen, Pajamas on. Eating breakfast. Pretending to have a civilized time, acting as if nothing had happenes last ni- Carl felt the bile rise in his throat as he thought about it more. 

'NO.' He told himself, 'don't think about that shit' walking into the kitchen he had ignored their cheeerful "good morning" and grabbed some orange juice and fixed him a plate of pancakes, eggs and bacon.

He only looked at plate of food in front of him and nothing else. Scared that if he did the he would be revisted by the memories of last night. He zoned them out, focusing on chewing his food slowly. Blocking out any noises coming from them.

A hand shook him out of his mental refuge.

He looked at the arm 'It's Dad's.' And then looked at Rick to him looking at him with concern and something else. Something that looked like guilt.

"Don't touch me." He spat at Rick, shrugging his shoulder out pf his hold. 

"Son what's wrong with you? Please talk to us." He said pleadingly. Carl would feel bad about the way he had made his dad sound like that, but then he was strucked down by the way he sounded last night because of Negan and he gagged out in real life. Cringing and disgusted.

"I know what you two did last night." He said inwardly cringing. "Don't talk to me or touch me for a good 2 days." He said getting up from the table not even bother to clean his plate. "He _attacked_ you dad, I just- I-I I just- no. Let me have my space please." Walking up the stairs.

Rick turned back, beet red, shame ridden face to Negan. Negan actually had the common sense to look anything but smug about this. 

"Fuck." They said, they were too caught up. Negan more so, he didn't mean to say that part of letting Rick let out everything inside so Carl knew. He was just giving dirty talk and was too focused and plowing Rick that he let whatever fall from his lips.

"I wonder if this is the kinda thing that traumatizes their kids for life?" Rick joked, but humor failed him.

Shit. Carl was actually fucked up by this and it was his fault for not being more quiet. 'SHIT.' He mentally kicked himself. 

He wanted to comfort him but like he said he needs his space.

Fuck they were going to have to deal with this later on. 


	6. Christmas Shopping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The best part of writing this chapter was having restart 2 times :)) because it didnt save :))))),]]]]]]])]])] i love it.

Negan went out a little after that morning. Wanting to get away from Carl and let him breathe a little after he had unintentionally mental and emotional scarred him deeply. He definitley deserved some time away from those memories and Negan. 

He decided to go out shopping, getting the last of the Grimes's Christmas requests. Rick had done his part with Judith, Carl, and Negan's throughout last week, now it was Negan's to get Rick's.

First he had went to the toy store to get Judith's rapidly increasing inventory of Barbie dolls, stuff animals and hatchimals. Then he went to different stores scattered about to get different types of PC equipment for Carl's gaming system and some games. He also threw in some noise cancelling headphones, as an visual apology for having to live through what he did. It would be funny if it werent for the fact Carl was really upset about it.

Rick had wanted 3 things, a new watch, a shaving kit, and a foot massager. He had of course gotten the requested items, but Negan still felt unsatisfied by the items. Only three things.

That did not sit well with him. It was so mundane and practical..those werent in any way interesting. He was going to do something about that. A certain gleam twinkled in his eyes as he thought about what to get Rick.

* * *

He returned home around 6 PM. 

The bag in his left hand was way lighter compared to the other two full of toys, parts, and packages in his right.

Well duh, I mean it was just a set of tuxedo underwear, some new lube, body oil and a fleshlight that was able to vibrate at not 1, not 2 , but 3 FREAKING OPTIONS.

Negan was so elated at the discovery of it, he had been wanting to spice up their sex life for awhile now.

Not that it was bad or anything, it was goddamn prefect just having Rick bounce on his cock, but he thought that they could do something new, and thos was new. He contemplated om buyimg a vibrator but he decided agaimst it for now. 

Rick would get _LOUD_ if they were going into that type of territory, and not wanting to make Carl traumatized more than he already was, he decided they could try that in the distant future. If he had made Rick scream from just his dick then think about what would happen if they had the vib- 

He shook his head, not wanting to walk into the house with a huge visible bulge in his pants. 

Setting his keys and mask on the counter, sanitizing and finally stepping out of his shoes he went to store the bags in a hidden spot away from Rick so he doesn't stubble upon it when he wraps their presents. Christmas was in 4 days.

They had already decorated the house inside and out, the christmas tree next to the window in the living room had been decorated accordingly. 

Walking back into said room, Carl was on the couch watching American Dad. 

"Where's Rick?" Negan had said taking a seat a little farther on the couch from him, giving him the space he demanded.

"He's giving Judith a bath? Where'd you go?" Carl asked, giving him the briefest glance then turning back to the show.

"Out Christmas shopping, I had got you something extra while i was out." 

Another quick glance.

"Hmm.." 

They went by in an awkward silence, although the TV was on, it did nothing to make the atmosphere any better.

Negan gave a deep sigh.

"Kid you know we are going to have to talk about the sort of things you heard last night right?" Negan said a little deflatedly. Knowing Carl wasn't going to want to talk about it.

"I know, but I really really don't think I'm comfortable with that discussion, not at all right now." Carl said, turning to look at Negan all the way this time.

His eyes were just like Rick's but different.

I mean well yeah.

Differnt people, different expressions. But Carl had his own uniqueness to his baby blue orbs. Maybe it was the pleading expression that was also mixed with grim, or maybe it was the teenage spirit that lit his eyes. Negan wasn't sure but they were quite different from his father after he had studied him.

"Yeah okay kid, take all the time you need you do deserve it after all. But we need to apologize like men about it to you Carl." Negan said back, scratching absentmindedly on his beard. 

"I need to shave this shit." He said to himself. After that the atmosphere had lifted, it wasnt all gone but it wasn't as thick as it had been originally and for that, Negan was grateful.

A funny thought popped into his brain.

"We were going so hard I wonder if the whole house shook." Negan grinned as he saw Carl sicken at his words.

"Your fucking gross." He ran upstairs disgusted, needing to get the fuck away from Negan after that.

Yeah that was fucked up, but it's. still. funny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, Ihope you're enjoying this story so far and for those of you who like it, I am happy you enjoy the stuff i produced.   
> After gaining confidence, I'm going to be doing another fic for these two. 💖 thank you so much again, and you should check my other story for them out when it's posted.


	7. Mending Scars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry that I haven't updated this in 6 days, 😳  
> There are no excuses. I'm not even close to running out of ideas with this story and I had all the time in the world. Im sorry babies. Im ✨insubordinant✨  
> Anyways here you all go. Also I made a more sadder angstier Negan/Rick highschool au fic.  
> Check it out if want to no biggie

The next morning.

Negan was the last one to wake up in the morning, coming down from the stairs and into the kitchen, he saw eggs hashbrowns and oatmeal already prepared.

Taking his seat on the side of the table vertical from Carl, he started eating.

"Mornin everybody" he gruffed out, voice still holding onto the sleep.

"Mornin" "Good morning sweetie" " **GOOD MORNING NEGAN!** "

He smiled at their early morning greetings, "How come you didn't wake me up?" He asked looking over to Rick. "I _tried_ to wake you up Negan, but apparently your body had other plans" Rick said taking to his cup of coffee again.

There was something about the way he said it that made Negan think Rick had tried to do something to him while he slept.

' _Hold on, I did feel that..._ '

Now that he thought about it-

He flashed Rick a look that held both fondness and shock, he had tried to give Negan a blowjob to wake him up but it had failed. "Oh, so we're into somnophelia now hm?" Negan asked him in a sarcastic teasing way, throwing a dark look at Rick.

Rick grinned in an innocent way that made Negan's heart skip a beat. The devil, himself, was the man in front of him. "I was just trying to wake you up." Negan rolled his eyes.

"The next time you guys fu-" Carl looked at Judith, who was looking at him. "- _freaking_ talk about intercourse at this table. In front of us. Im going to throw up. All over you two. And this table." Carl said.

They forgot he was at the age that he could understand sex language and flirtatious body language.

He had gave them a look that told them he was seriously done with their bullshit.

They both blushed and coughed at being called out caught a second by a 16 year old teenager. 

"Sorry son." "My bad kid." Simultaneoulsy mumbling out their apologies.

"Whatever." He said getting up from the table.

Negan swore he heard Carl say under his breath " _I'm so fucking tired of them talking about that shit._ " While he was washing his dishes.

He and Rick exchanged a guilty look. 

Thankfully Judith being the angel she was, broken the awkward tension in the air. "I want up." She said putting her little hands the air and making a grasping motion. Rick laughed, "C'mon babygirl, let's go clean you up" he said picking her out of her highchair and going to the bathroom to wash her up.

While at the table Negan was thinking about how both he and Rick might start being sexually frustrated all because of a 16 year old. 

"Damn kid." Negan said aloud laughing, children could be deadly when it comes to relationships. But he still loved them both and for the last 7 months he might as well have been the unspoken parent at this rate. He and Rick were going to live out the rest of eachother's lives together, so yeah it was pretty unspoken at this point.

' _I need to marry him_ ' Negan thought randomly. But that was for another time, (and another story), he got up and went over to the kitchen where Carl was "Hey Car-" Carl walked away before he even had the chance to make conversation with him.

* * *

Everyone in the house was bored beyond comprehesion, they were all gathered on the couch, watching some movie Negan didn't even care to recognize it at this point. The snow was picking up outside making it a white storm of flurries.

Negan's thoughts had randomly taken over to his job, P.E. teacher, when an idea sparked in his head. 

He reached over grabbing the remote and turend it off. All three heads on the couch snapped in his direction, all burning into his soul with a fiery rage. 

He stood up and laughed at their reactions. "Everyone go change into something loose and comfortable. We are having a family workout session" he said. 

" **WHAT?!** " erupted from Rick and Carl, Judith dodn't really understand what Negan had said seeing she is only 3 and knows nothing about Physical activity.

"Negaan why' you turn off the T.V." she said in her adolescent voice. 

"Because Judy, I want all of us to be in physical shape, so that we can have a better and happy life." He said softly kneeling in front of her.

"But I want T.V." she pouted.

"I'm sorry but no, if I wanted to workout I would have gone to gym class for that." Carl spat angrily.

"Well, Carl _,_ I think you forgot that I am the _Gym teacher_ , and your father over there" he pointed at Rick, "chose _me_ to fill the position as his _loving life partner_ , meaning that he chose all the qualities about me including my life dedicated towards fitness and better physical shape, the whole package for my package." He finished it with a dirty wink, Carl gagged. 

"Fine whatever just _please_ stop talking about your sex life damn" Carl begged, he got up from the couch and went to go change into some sweats and a tank top.

Rick who was beyond crimson on the face, found his composure and got up from the couch, Negan shifted his gaze over to him "Get your ass up them stairs and change into somethin' more comfortable now." Negan's tone was deathly serious.

Rick swallowed and just nodded, walking away to go change.

He moved the sofa out of the way making it extra spacious in the living room, grabbing his phone he started playing his workout playlist on shuffle -Message In A Bottle from the police started playing- it'll have to do, to thr house speakers. 

Judith, happy at the more space in the living room started running around, "There we go babygirl, that's the spirit." Negan cheered her on, "Be careful." He said with a concern that she might hurt herself.

Negan stripped off his gray shirt and started doing some pushups, Rick had came down in white baggy shirt and some black sweatpants. 

"Loving the view, I really do have to say." He said admiring Negan's shoulders and muscles.

Negan grinned at him toungue in teeth. "Crunches. Go." He directed, "I can't believe I got a gym teacher as my boyfriend." Rick shook his head laughing, before getting onto his back and started kicking the air.

Carl was over by the wall, giving a feeble attempt at a sit up, Negan got up and had held held his feet down to make it easier. "Kid, this is exactly why you need physical activity, you can't even do a simple sit up." Negan started. Carl rolled his eyes as he was able to get off the floor now. "How many?" He asked "I should make you do 50, but since I'm nice kid, do 18" Negan said.

And Carl did them, annoyed of course but he still did them, Negan had let go of his feet and helped him up. "Go grab some water, it helps with th-" "I never asked" Carl cut him off while walking into the kitchen. "Dickhead." Negan called after him, Carl just gave him the finger in return. ' _Fucking_ _teenagers_.'

A wicked idea sparked in Negan's head.

He walked over to Carl, "Uh, um Negan, what do you want?" He asked nervously at the way Negan towered over him. He picked Carl up and held him over his head as if he were nothing. "Kid you should eat more you literally weigh about nothing from how it feels." Negan stated calmly. Carl was spazzing out. " **NEGAN PUT ME DOWN** " Carl shouted. "I don't think so kid. Hm, say if you were a little more physically fit maybe you could get out of this little inconvienance huh? Doubt it, I'm still strong either way." Negan stated.

Upon entering the living room Judith looked at them and her face instantly lightened up with exhilaration, as if she was seeing fireworks for the first time. "Yes." She said, Negan gave a rabbut toothed grin at her "Yeah?" He asked "Yes." She said again.

With skill, he maneuvered one arm to let Carl hang off his shoulder then picked Judith up with his other. " **PUT ME DOWN!!!!!!** " Carl screamed again as he was now hung over Negan's shoulder. He felt Negan's laughter vibrate thoughout his entire body, "Nah, why don't you stay up there a little bit" Negan said as he was now holding a 3 year and a 16 year old on his shoulders. 

Rick walked over, a look of utter amusement lining his face. "Oh wow." He said laughing at the image in front of him. "Oh wow indeed blue eyes." Negan said smugly, "Now why don't you come over here so we can be PDA in front of the kids like some couples do." Rick laughed and closed the gap between them, giving Negan a passionate kiss while he held onto the kids, they were interupted when Carl began to squirm, "No. NO MORE. Stop doing that." He said. 

"Way to ruin the mood Carl" Rick said tiredly. "Whatever just put me down, all my blood's in my brain now." He said from over his shoulder.

"Carl I don't think you're in any position to give orders to us, especially with sass. That is one of the reasons why you are on my shoulder now kid." Negan stated looking over his shoulder at Carl. Carl sighed. "I'm sorry for giving you attitude, now can you put me down" 

Negan looked back to Rick "I dunno, will you let me and Rick kiss without being a total pain in the ass?" Negan asked irratated. "Fine. Now please put me down" Judith who was quiet and in her own little world the entire time in Negan's arm reached over and began to tickle Carl. He squirmed some more "Judy, don't do that!!!!" he said in between laughs. "You're not bein' nice Carl" she said angrily.

Rick let out a loud laugh, "You tell him sweetie." He praised her. "OKOK I'm sorry for being annoying, and for being rude and all of the other things now can you please stop." He had tears in his eyes as his nerves were being stimulated with a funny feeling. "Okay, okay, that's enough sweetie, he learned his lesson." Rick said as he took and held Judith on his hip now. Negan let go of Carl and placed him on floor. 

Carl had looked at him in a shy way before letting his gaze drop to the ground "I'm sorry for acting the way I did, it was kinda rude" he blushed afterwards. 

_'_ Oh... _OH'_ Negan caught up ' _He's talking about me and Rick fucking_ '

"Kid it's okay, like I said we are totally in the wrong for that, I hope that didn't scar you forever" Negan said sincerely. "Carl, we are sorry about that and how we made you feel." Rick said just as guilty.

"It's okay, I realize now that it's your house and your rules and if you want to um..well.. get quote unquote ' _dicked down_ '... then you have every right to do so. No matter how gross it is to me dad, you can feel good too." Carl said akwardly, he looked away,"Just don't be so loud _please_." Negan and Rick both laughed at him "Yeah we'll try next time sorry" Rick said embarrased.

"Now c'mere" he said opening his arms, Carl followed suit and wrapped his around him and Judith. Negan smiled and joined them squishing them all together towards him. 

He might have been crazy or he might have been overthinking or something, but he could've swore he felt Carl nuzzle against his bare chest. And that just made his heart swell up adoration and a weird sort of pride and mostly love. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for making this long😐 my bad   
> Anyways i hope you enjoyed, and im sorry for not posting UwU sue me. 
> 
> LMFAOOO!!!! Y'all after reading this: Don't be shy put some more 👁👃👁
> 
> Me:😳
> 
> 💀💀💀💀


	8. Sexual Frustration

The next morning.

Negan was wrapping presents with Rick early that Sunday morning. He had made sure he put Rick's _Special_ gift only accesible by him and no one else. He had planned to wrap it after they finished and Rick was out of the room.

"You know, it may sound a tad bit crazy, but it ain't feeling to much like Christmas." Rick stated in a sour tone to his southern drawl.

"Yeah I fucking hear what you're sayin'. It's because of this goodamn pandemic. It's taking out more and more people by the minute. It's really sad." Negan said "People fucking loosing their lives and shit all because of these dumb hill-billied backwatered ignorant ass swines that can't do most simplest thing and wear a mask, social distance, and keep normal levels of hygiene." 

Negan was angry. So many families and friends loosing loved ones because of the fucking pandemic, that could easily be preventable if they could stop being so stupid and incredibly selfish.

"I couldn't take it if you leave me Rick."

Negan's tone held so much desperation that it made Rick snap his head up at him. 

"Not only you, but Carl, or Lord fucking forbid Judy. I would loose my. Fucking. mind." Negan says, his voice cracking as he thought about they're deaths. He would surely break down and die a 

Rick scoots over into his lap, abdanoning his present, he come and wraps his legs around his torso and cup his face in hands. "Hey." He says softly looking into his usual warm Hazel gaze now was replaced by a dark cold sadness. "There ain't _**NOTHIN**_ ' on this damn planet or the fucking universe that will ever take us away from you, or you away from us." He states, holding no room for opposition. "We aren't going to let that happen Negan, the only way we goin' out is by natural cause." He says. 

"Both of us will be old and wrinkley but the most happiest damn fools life has ever seen, knowing that we lived a good life raising 2 beautiful kids and having ourselves some even more beautiful grandbabies. Hmm..you'll probably have more wrinkles than me since you're older." Rick trails off, lost in his self thoughts.

Negan laughs at him, feeling Rick pull him out of the emotional storm that had caught him in his mental. He gave him a deep sweet passionate kiss, "I love you so much baby. So fucking much." He rested their forheads against eachothers amd their breathes mingled in the air. 

Rick gave him a beautiful soft smile. "I love you twice as much Negan." Rick stated

Negan brought his arms to close around the man on his lap pulling him flush against him, Rick returned the sentimental geature before placing his head on Negan's shoulder. They felt their hearts beat at the same steady content beat, and Rick let out a relaxed sigh. Negan squeezed him a little more, and they just stayed like that for a while.

Negan felt Rick's body laugh through his own and he glanced down at the man "Whatcha laughin' 'bout?" He said skeptically. Rick just shook his head, smiling in Negan's shoulder.

"Nothin'. I was just thinking about how we'd be so overbearin' and overprotective of Judy, that she probably won't ever have a boyfriend." Rick said. He shared a laugh with Negan as they thought about it. "Damn right, the first boy to ever even think about corrupting our daughter will get his fucking brain bashed by my trusty bat." Negan said. 

Rick laughed harder at that, and Negan just stared in adoration as he watched Rick's face light up, his breath was taken from him. "Fuckin' beautiful." He stated.

Rick stopped laughing and looked up at Negan after hearing his comment. Negan was looking at him in a way that made Rick's heart melt and had placed a warm pleasant heat in his belly. But that heat started spreading up his chest, then his neck and finally his face. He got flustered by those two words. And it wasn't because of how Negan always tells him that in bed and in general but the way he said it now, the way he looked while he said it. It all had a serious effect on Rick.

"Stop." Rick said looking away shyly, starting to push out of Negan's hold. 

Negan only held him tighter as he brought their bodies back together in a more fimer lock than before. "No." He said huskily "You are the most beautiful fucking thing I've ever had the pleasure of coming into contact with, Rick Grimes. You and your damn kids. There are no amounts of words that could describe the deep fucking love I have for you." He said never breaking eye contact with him. He gave him a kiss that held equal firmness of his words earlier. He got aroused because of it in the process, and after breaking away he hid his face in Rick's neck. 

Rick moved a bit and was met with something very hard under his bottom as he moved back. "Negan... how the fuck do you get hard after serious proclamations of deep affection?" Rick asked in a tiresome way.

Negan huffed a laughted under Rick's neck.

"Ahh!! Don' do that!" Rick exclaimed in laughter. 

Negan did it again and couldn't help his own laughter escaping him as he watched Rick squirm on him but then Rick grinded down his still very present boxer claded boner. "Mmh" Negan moaned. Rick froze and tensed up, and Negan was about to cease their still crushing hold together to see if he was okay, when he felt it.

Rick was hard against him.

"Huh." Negan started "Who gets hard after getting in tickled in the neck?" He asked matching Rick's equal teasing tone.

"Negan get the fuck off of me." Rick said seriously. "Hmm, I don't think I will. I think I'll stay right here holding your pretty ass in my arms. Besides I'm 1042% sure that lil' Negan won't be the only one sad after we split apart." He looks down at their pitched tents "Ain't that right Rick Jr.?" To his fucking surprise, he was answered with a throb from Rick's dick. 

Rick blushes madly and puts his face in his hand while groaning to himself. "You're such an asshole." He says irratated "And you fuckin' love it, dont you?" Rick doesn't answer, and that upsets Negan. Negan grinds his member against Rick's causing a shaky moan to fall from Rick's lips. "Don't. You?" He reiterates his earlier question. "Yes Negan, **fuck**.! Now are you going to continue bein' a dick about it or ar' you goin' to fuckin' take care of _ou_ _r_ dicks?" Rick asked, with as much attitude that could rival Carl's usual one. Negan laughed at his vexation, and then took a quick glance at the abandoned half wrapped presents that laid on the floor.

"I don't know, we do have a lot of them to wrap Rick." Negan said teasingly. Rick's response was a cold hard glare, and if looks could kill, Negan was sure his death with a be a demented sadistic fetish. "Fine." Rick spat.

He quite literally smacked Negan's arms from around him, and got up from his hold. He sauntered over from where they were placed on the floor, still pitching a tent, and grabbed some clothes from the dresser and walked to the master bathroom, avoiding the scatered toys unwrapped om the floor. "Where the fuck do you think you're going!?" Negan asked, he was beyond confused. Rick whipped back, and shot the best motherfucking ice queen bitch look Negan has ever seen. "I'm takin' a friggin' shower Negan, the fuck does it look like to you?" He was still mad. 

"I _Know_ what it looks like, and I _know_ what is your doin'. _Rick._ " He tilted his head at him, "My question is, _Why_ are you taking a _shower_?" "Because I need to." He stated matter of factly. Negan gave him a blank stare before it changed into a dark smirk. "Then maybe I'll join you, honey." He got up, the bulge in his boxers never leaving either, and made his way to the bathroom. 

"Uh-uh. Not happening." Rick shook his head. "Come the fuck on Rick, why are you being such a fucking prat?!" Negan threw his hands up in frustration. Rick gave him a humorless chuckle, "I don't know Negan. It's like you said, those presents _aren't going to wrap themselves._ " he stated in a grim tone, no amusement of any kind seeping through his voice. Negan gave him an angry scowl. 

Rick took a moment to laugh at his anger, like he was genuinley proud of it, "Have fun, _honey_ " he closed and locked the bathroom door and Negan heard the fan began to run and the kick of water hitting the tub floor. He stood at that door with a dumb look on his face. "What the fuck just happened?" He asked himself, his eyebrows scrunching together. The air around them, was tense and uncomfortable between them now, Negan realized that it was sexual frustration and shook his head. "I shouldn't have teased him." He said before making his way over to the presents and resumed wrapping them. He was still hard after that, and no matter how much he tried to distract himself with the mundane of tedious work of wrapping paper around boxes, it never drove away his want for Rick. 

Rick didn't get out the shower until a good 15 minutes later. He walked out towel around his torso, and steam that had been trapped in the bathroom following suit. "What were you doing in there?" Negan asked, having been finished of his wrapping 7 minutes into Rick's long ass shower. "What do you think I was doing in there Negan?" He shot back, although he sounded challenging, Negan could pick up his teasing in under that bite, Negan's still ever raging boner pumped more blood at the realization that Rick had masturbated in his shower, taht's why he was taking forever. 

He got off the bed, and stomped dangerously over to Rick, and pressed him against the wall, his body still wet from the water and the towel still hung on his naked body. He didn't give him a look of shock or anger like Negan gad expected instead he only looked back with half lidded eyes, complety over it. Negan got in his face and his voice lowered, rough and dominate "So you're just going to leave Lil' Negan high end dry?" "Hmm.." Rick looked down at Negan's crotch "I'm sorry Little Negan, but tell your stupid counterpart to stop being stupid." Rick said talking to Negan's penis. Negan awaited Rick's eyes on his own before he closed them, and leaned in. 

Rick knowing he would try it, rested his index finger on Negan's lips. Negan, feeling something other than lips against his own, opened his eyes unsurely before pulling back. Taking in Rick's smug expression for bit until Rick leaned in close to his hear and whispered: "Aw Negan, what about the presents?" He mocked a sad pout before pulling out of Negan's grasp and laughing maniancally at his own words. He went back to the bathroom, closed the door, and returning back fully dressed.

Negan had gotten his own clothes and went entered the hot bathroom. After a moment of washing he could not deny himself the desprate pleausre anymore and began stroking himself to the thoughts of Rick. He was pulling himself closer to the edge was about to spill over when at that exact moment, a loud booming knock n the door scared him out of his orgasm. "Negan, come out of the shower. It's your turn to make breakfast today." Rick's voice shouted on the other side. He turned off the water, toweled himself dry and got dressed, he was beyond pissed. Making his way out of the bathroom, he saw Rick standing in front of the door with a knowing smirk on his face. "Fuck you Grimes." He shoulder checked him- not to roughly- before throwing his worn T-shirt and boxers in his laundry bakset and made his way downstairs.

Rick was so proud of himself that morning. He had finally broke the same man that had made it a fucking job to break him when it came to sex, and it felt nice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed 🥰💖
> 
> *goes back to vigiaroulsy writing Do You See Me?*


	9. Burning Desire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my. We hit 300😳!!  
> I just wanted to say thank you to everybody who reads this.
> 
> Before I even wrote this two weeks plus some added days ago, I had a whole mental breadown because I thought that nobody would like my material or wouldn't even read it.  
> So let me reiterate this for all of you.
> 
> THANK. YOU. so so much, y'all have NO idea. It literally fills me with unfathomable amounts of joy that y'all read MY stuff and liked it. If it wasn't for you readers I would be crying into my pillow having a uncalled for depressive episode. Dead ass.🤣
> 
> So thank you all for showing me so much love and support for my content omg. 🧡🥰😘
> 
> If we get to 500 hits, I'll turn this into a series. deadass. ✌😁 
> 
> Anyways enough of this long ass note😂 I hope you enjoy this chapter.🧡

Judith woke up at 7:49 AM that Christmas Eve morning in her crib. 

She was feeling energetic, refreshed and as always, happy. She rubbed her eyes with her little tiny hands, maneuvered the best her toddler body could to the rail of her crib to stand and released her ever famous cry for her father.

"DADDY!!!!!"

While waiting for her farther to come and get her from her containment, she looked around in her room, toys scattered around and stuffed animals and little dolls all about her floor. 

Her eyes locked with the gleam of light that came from her window where the curtains were cracked. It brightened the entire square like shaped area that it had touched on the floor. 

She just stared at it, captivated by the bright light that contrasted against the general brightness of the room. It was so bright. The brightness of the light was the only thing went through her little toddler brain. 

She heard her father's footsteps walk closer to her room and then Rick's voice "Good morning sugar muffin', how'd you sleep?!" Rick asked walking towards her with a smile that could compete with the sun's warmth. Rick picked her up and she instantly latched onto his hip like a sifaka lemur. Smiling with glee and looking at Rick "Good. How 'bouh you Daddy" her little infant voice was so cute. Rick laughed and his smile grew, showing his teeth in a beautiful manner, "I slept good sugar, real good. Although I'm not quite as fond with the the morning as I was of the night." He says thoughtful, and his face contracts together in a stern way looking off into the distance. Judy not understanding most of what he said after the 'real good' in the last part of is sentence, stared blankly at him before reaching and putting one of her little chubby hands on his face. She gave a giggle when Rick mouthed at her hand "Om nom nom nom" he went. Her bubbly laugh increased into screams of amused cries. 

When was Rick finished, he looked at her and she watched her dad's eyes dart back and forth at her, the present smile on his lips never leaving but ever changing turned into big soft one. "I love you Judy" he presses a kiss to her forehead and Judith feels her little heart swell, "I love you too Daddy." she says and cups her little baby to his cheek. She looks at him for a little moment before she tapped his nose "Boop" she chirps. And she feels Rick's laughter vibrate through her, eyes smiling too. "Let's go get you some breakfast, babygirl." he says. Making his way out of the room and down the stairs with her still on his hip, he sits her down in her highchair before going over to the stove where Negan was still cooking. "Mornin' Princess" He beams over to her. "Hi Negan" she returns face lit.

She was too busy looking over into the room where the television was showing Paw Patrol to have caught Rick and Negan glare each other to death. The tension between never going away. Rick came back with her plate of scrambled eggs, a few sausages, and her bowl of strawberry oatmeal. She began to eat after waiting a few moments for it all to cool down. Negan finished cooking and made a plate for Carl before grabbing his own, taking the seat across from Rick rather his usual one at his side.

"Huh, I don't know whether to be offended or thrilled by your lack of presence." He's looking over the mug of coffee to Negan, blue eyes looking on.

"Oh darlin' please, we both know at the end of this you'll just come begging back to me, because you will never get enough of me Rick." Negan says with a dark sneer on his face. He tilted his face in the similar way earlier that morning in their room, eyes lidded and a threatening smirk cast on his lips "You'll _always_ come back to me Rick at the end of the day. There's no else that can fill your life the way I do- hell there's no person that can _fill_ you like Ido period." This earns a very red blush from Rick, Negan doesn't know if it's from embarrassment or anger. "But no matter how long you fight it you'll just end up breaking in the end. And you'll come back begging like an inmate in jail _pleading_ for their freedom, because you said it yourself Rick." He leans forward closer to the table locking his eyes on Rick's with a darkness to his hazel eyes that makes Rick shiver. "You need me." He whispers before leaning back in his chair and chewing a sausage with the most self absorbed smirk, like he holds the recorded for biggest stick in the world. 

Rick is infuriated because of it "You aren't that big." That is the complete opposite from what he wants to say but it just slips out. His eyes narrowed further than before and his face still beet red, Negan laughs at him. "I may not carry the biggest stick, baby, but we both know that It's pretty big...I mean it's way above average, and it's sure as shit bigger than yours." He flashes Rick a dirty wink, tongue caught between his teeth. It pisses Rick off more, he wants to say to something, he wants to retort back so that Negan doesn't win this little verbal boxing match. But he just can't take the way Negan is looking at him and the way his voice is deep and raspy. It's driving him fucking crazy that he so desperately wants to flip over this damn table between stomp his way over to Negan and kiss away that fucking gloat on his lips, but he can't Judith was right there and Carl could walk down any minute and besides he wanted to prove Negan's words wrong, make him eat it like he ate his cock. 

Rick turned his face away, shame placing across his face. "I hate you sometimes." he says quietly

"No Rick, you don't actual hate me, you hate the way I fu-" Negan catches himself "mess with your head, make you feel things you don't like feeling, but you love it nonetheless." Negan gets up and stands over Rick, shadowing over him in a way that makes Rick want to move away. Negan's looking at him in a dour way now, the traces of conceited vanity all washed away. "You're pissed at me because I drive you _mad_ Rick. But I'm not gonna stop no matter how angry you get at me, I like getting you all heated, I freakin' love the way I get under skin and travel up your body to your mind, I _love it_ Rick. You are mine, and I have every right to drive you batshit crazy Rick." 

Rick feels himself getting hard with every word Negan is saying, his breathing is hard and out of synch, his heart is beating faster and he feels his body temperature rise by the minute, his body is glued to his chair and it feels like it's own actual fire. He realizes that every word Negan speaks is true, he was Negan's in all definitions of possession and it made him beyond happy to his. 

Rick couldn't take it anymore, he took to his coffee to distract his hard on with the scolding hot liquid n his lips but Negan grabbed it out of his hands and placed it on the table before he took Rick's chin in a firm but still gentle hold and made Rick look back to the warm amber honey golded orbs that continued attack him emotionally, physically, and mentally. 

"I know you like it when I do it to you Rick, I know you like how I get you all burnin' underneath and on the outside. You freakin' love it just as much as I do. But no matter how much you do, you continue to fight it, to fight _me_. I don't like it not. one. f-ing bit." Those amber eyes turned into a blazing fire that made Rick feel like he was being seared on everywhere on and inside of his body. He crouches down and gets closer so that they were eye to eye. "I am as much of yours as you are of mine, but you can't deny me of you, Rick. Yes, I am an asshole, but goddammit, I still love you, no matter how much teasin' I do to you, I'm still gonna take care of you." His eyes soften "But I need you to admit thar you love how I drive you wild, and stop fighting me." Negan says sincerely.

Rick had been still this entire time, his tongue now had felt like lead in his mouth and his voice was scratchy off sounding as he spoke. "Yes Negan, God, I love when you drive me crazy." But he meant every word and Negan could tell. "I know you do baby." He replies and that same smirk appears on his face. Rick wipes it away the moment it meets his eyes.

"Not tryin' to nag or anything but I really don't want to see you two suck face the moment I wake up." Carl groans. 

They pull away and look over at him. Rick apologizes while shyly looking away. "Nice timin' kid, real nice. I just got your daddy to stop resisting me and you ruin the moment" Negan states rather dryly. Carl's face heats up before it changes into disgust. "I think I'll come back for my plate" he scowls at Negan "If I even have appetite left." And then turns out of the kitchen going back upstairs. 

Rick turns back to him in scolding way. "Do you seriously not remember what happened 3 days ago?!" he asks angrily. Negan's laughter fills the house. 

"Yes I remember, shit is still hilarious no matter how messed up it is Ricky" 

Rick scoffs and rolls his eyes, but damn he did have to admit the situation was comedy itself, severely fucked up though. But stiil funny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *deranged laughter*
> 
> I wanted to make them even more sexually frustrated but my brain kept asking me why the fuck was I writing and I didn't feel like having another one of those weird deep philosophical "Why am I here, Why am I doing the things I do?" episodes.
> 
> Any fucking ways I hoped you enjoyed.  
> P.S. I am so sorry for making Negan soo OOC, I um..- 😳 I can't write his character that good.


	10. Painful Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi anonymous virtual strangers😌❤
> 
> We are on the CUSP of reaching 400 HITS!!🎉🎉 Oh my Gid another milestone?!So so so fast?!! 🥺 Oh my gosh I have to give all y'all a big warm MASSIVE Thank you to those who reads this and like it, as I said before ✨mental breakdown✨ before I even started writing this. 
> 
> I've been thinking about the series I said I would make if I reached 500 hits. It's gonna habe to take place like before this story, and it's going to further explain how everything was before they met Negan and how they met Negan. 🥴🥴
> 
> I do hope this and the other story goes well, I hate how I just now thought about giving y'all background information about this AU, but I just literally thought about them like 2 days ago.😩🥺 I'm sorry.
> 
> Anyways I hope you enjoy.

Carl was sitting in bed watching some memes, filling his room with laughter. He got quite fond of it over the global mandated Stay At Home order. It was tough times, he couldn't see anyone of his friends, couldn't see anybody's faces, couldn't go anywhere, and couldn't do anything. It was **depressing** and it drove him Crazy for human interaction other than his Dad's, Judith's and Negan's. 

" _Carl_ "

His father's voice summons him from downstairs. It makes him laugh out loud to himself in that moment it seemed like they were telepathically linked at times. He gets up from his bed with a sigh and drags himself downstairs.

"Yeah Dad?"

"Carl we're going to the groc'ry store, so go grab your stuff."

Carl lets out a deep groan. "Why do I have to go? Why can't you take Negan?" He doesn't care that he sounds like a whiney 9 year old telling their parents they don't want to go to bed. Rick gives him a look. "We're goin' cuz 1 I said so, 2 I'm giving you drivin' lessons, and 3 Negan is currently cooking dinner and needed some thangs and asked me to get it." Rick's tone was a warning that he wasn't having it from Carl.

Carl was about to argue some more but then he had finally processed his dad's words. Driving lessons? The thought of driving scared him shitless, but it was a thing he had to achieve in order to grow. He was at the age to get his tempts but he wouldn't be able to go anywhere cuz of the current pandemic.

He looks over at Negan who was in the kitchen wearing glasses while reading what looked like some sort of recipe book -Carl couldn't tell from where he was- with Judith perched on his hip staring down at the book as well.

"Dad, I'm not ready to drive just yet." He starts hoping to get out of this but Rick's not having it. "Whatcha scared for, it's gon' be alright." He tries at comfort but it does little.

Negan walks over to them. "Carl, driving ain't so bad." This earns a glare from him. "I'm being serious." But Judith at that moment decided that Negan's glasses were her new play thing and started messing with them on his face, debunking Negan's previous statement. "It really ain't I swear. You just gotta get used to it and practice more. Hey!! Just like sports." His face beams with his comparison, Carl rolls his eyes. "The more you practice at it, the better you'll be." He states in his teaching voice. 

"I guess" Carl grumbles looking away in teenage defiance, it's strange to think how his dad and his not dad was pulling a paternal double team. "C'mon Carl it ain't gon' be that bad, now go get your stuff." Rick says starting to slip on his shoes amd jacket.

After exiting the house and getting into the car Carl's fear only worsened. He didn't know why he was so scared for. ' _It's just drivin' a car jackass._ ' he told himself but the fear never went away.

The drive goes by in a weird sort of silence. It's not awkward, not at all, but Rick can tell Carl's still on edge about driving and it makes him uneasy. Rick turns on the radio and starts turning the stations until he's on his favorite country song.

He starts snapping along with one of songs, feeling the (rhythm?) of it, nodding along to it. Carl turns from his window and gives him a displeased look.

"How do you even like this Dad?"

"Carl we're southerns, country is in our blood."

"But that doesn't mean we should fit the description of that stereotype." Carl says matter-of-factly. 

Rick tips his head at him giving him a teasing glare, eyebrows raised and a smile he can't hold back cursing his lips. "You callin' me a stairee-oh, Boy?"

Carl nods his head in affirming manner. "I sure am. Blue eyes, curly hair, your little dress shirts, your southern accent, Deputy- Dad your practically **screaming** 'Straight conservative farmer redneck' at me." Carl frowns. 

Rick fills the entire car with a loud bellow of laughter. Tears fill his eyes and he swerves the car, which then only adds onto his laughter. It takes him a moment to collect his breathing and even still he's cracking up afterwards. 

Carl feels a warm pride feeling fill his chest for making Rick genuinley laugh, it wasn't something he usually does which was so weird. He had a sense of humor and was quirky but he always seemed to have a neutral face all the time.

Carl's thoughts travel back to when Lori had left with Shane 3 years prior. Those were the most saddest darkest times EVER. He thought that Rick would never see the sun ever again, hell he himself was right along with him. After Lori just left there was an endless cloud of sadness, pain, and abandanmnet that was always raining on them. He was so fucking mad at Lori, that he _Hated_ her, it wasn't until he decided to play sports as a way to vent that they met Negan.

"It's nice seein' you laugh Dad." He says, adoring his father. 

Rick quicks a glance over to Carl, searching his son for what was going on with him.

"Of course Carl, but I gotta ask where'd that come from all out of the blue?" 

"Well I was just thinking how 'mom' " -Carl made air quotes- "just left and everything was just so sad and dark and like I was just sayin' I miss hearin' ya laugh...I guess." Carl shrugged, they've talked about it a bunch before, hell even with Negan, but bringing it up makes him feel bad because they already decided to heal from Lori's damage.

Rick's eyes got as wide as saucers after hearing Carl's statement. He felt dismayed. "Carl how long you been thinkin' about it?" Rick asks softly.

"I don't know, not that long. But it doesn't matter. She moved on, and so did we." Carl turns to look out the window indifferently.

"Hey" there's a reassuarance to his softness now "Carl, I think about it all the time. You're allowed to think about it, y'know that right?"

"But I don't want to think about it!!" He shouts, his face is turning red and Rick feels his heart trying desperately not to re-open those old painful wounds.

"I don't **want** to think about her LEAVING US. I don't want to think about her abandoning us, abandoning you, Dad. We had a perfect fucking family, we LOVED eachother but _SHE_ ruined it. She left us for _him_." Although Carl's voice was wavering and painful tears were trying desperately to escape him, the venom he still spat with his words were still ever pressent.

Rick felt his own tears began to shed and his own heart bleed internally revisiting these sad and unbearable memories. But hearing Carl's just made it even worse for him, knowing his son was hurting just like he was. 

When Lori left him the only things he felt was denial, then he started blaming himself, and then after that was anger and finally came a numbing cold sadness. Everything between them was damn-near perfect, they had some fights but it was over little childish things, never anything that would make the other person to cheat on you. Rick felt his throat seize up, although what Carl said was true; they did move on and they did heal, it still hurt like a bitch to remember it all.

"I'm sorry Carl, I didn't know that this was eatin' you up on the inside still. That's my fault, I do have some major parts to play in all this though, instead of holding us altogether I pushed us apart in the process." 

"Dad you didn't do _shit_ so stop apologizing." Carl seethes out, he hated how his father still takes accountability for why Lori left. He treated her like a fucking goddess and she chose to do what she did with that nasty fuck, Shane. Carl absolutely hated her- and probably will for the rest of his life.

He sniffed and wiped some of the hot tears that were streaming. Crying was a weakness and he wasn't going to show his dad he was weak. He wasn't for the last 3 years, he was the glue holding him and Judith, (AND HIMSELF!!!!), together after Lori ripped them apart. The tears were more of frustration, more of anger than they were of emotional distress and pain. 

He looks at Rick who too is crying and his eyes are red making his blue eyes stand out even more. They were the sad blue now.

"Coral I know I can't ask you to forgive her, that would be hypocritcal of me to ask you dat 'cuz I'm sure I won't ever forgive her..ever. But I want you to know that this is a battle we already won. This is somethin' we survived." Another glance to the road, then back to Carl "We already passed this storm, 'member? We are just dryin' ourselves out. These past 3 years were the most diffcult years in our lives, it was somethin' alright." He gives out a humorless laugh "But for these past 3 years, Coral, I've never been more proud of you than I am now. You were the one helping me outta my funk, and taken care of Judith while going through your own Rainy Blues. And for that- shit Carl- for that is why I am so happy that you are **My** son."

Carl looks away a little embarrased by his dad's possessiveness, but it still makes him feel warm and it definitely puts out the intense fiery hatred for Lori inside of him. 

"Now I'm sorry that I did shut you and everybody else out and may have been a dark angsty brick wall whenever we did have those little talks, but son I was just so hurt and I'm sorry it may have hurted you more than the situation itself. But I am here now. I promise I won't ever do that to you. If you are going through somethin' Carl, I want to help you outta of it. Number 1 'cuz I'm your father, I will _always_ carry that job. And 2 because you did the same for me and I am so thankful for you Carl."

He's stopped crying and now there's no sign of sadness or pain that haunt his features. No. It's like there's a warm glow on him, and he looks at Carl in a pleased way with a smile that makes Carl feel that same glow his Dad looks.

They pull into the parking lot and it's only then that Carl realizes he hasn't said anything back. He's just been staring at his Dad with a dumb look. More embarrassment heats his already hot face, and the cool December air does nothing to calm it. Rick walks in front of the car, (Negan calls it the soccer mom-mobile), and towards him. He opens his arms wide with a smile that shows his teeth in a happy way. 

"C'mere son." 

Carl wants to object because there's no way in _hell_ he was bout to be caught hugging his father in a _KROGER'S PARKING LOT_ , but he mutes his teenage paranoia and runs to his Dad and gives him a nice squeeze. It earns a suprised chuckle from Rick and a firm squeeze in return. "I love you son." Rick says, pulling him back at arms length to look at his boy. Carl smiles faintly a mumbles "I love you too Dad."

Rick presses a kiss on his forehead, which earns a displeased groan from Carl "We're in public." He says annoyed. Pushing Rick off on him. Rick gives out a laugh at Carl's teenage behavior, "Carl no matter how old you get, you'll always be my little boy." He states. Carl puts his mask on and starts walking away rather fastly "You're embarassing me Dad." He grumbles.

And Rick is yet again lost on where that little boy who always demanded kisses from him and Lori went. He sighs, putting her name in the back of his subconcious and puts his own mask on and starts making his way to the grocery store.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you can automatically read when Rick says Carl that it goes "Coral" in your brain😂
> 
> Anyways I'll do the shopping scene and driving scene in the next chapter.
> 
> Oh and like I said I feel really bad for giving context when I just created it like 2 days aho in the shower.🤣🥴. I'll explain it all in my other fic...well if you guys want😐 I'm still under the impression that 15 kudos is not good. 
> 
> FEEL FREE TO COMMENT!!!❤


	11. !!!UPDATE!!!!

HI everybody❤

I know I know. 'This isn't a mf CHAPTER😡 TF ARE YOU DOIN!!??' and I'm sorry🥺 I iust need to update y'all instead of leaving you in the darkness of unknowing for my stories. 

Okay first, I just want to say I am _NOT_ abdanoning this fic or my other fic "Do You See Me" I've just been super busy trying to come up and put together my upcoming fic I said I would produce if we hit 500 and OH. MY. GOD. 🤣 y'all certaintly was hell bent on me doing that other fic, my gawd, 492 hits (at the time I am writing this) MY GOODNESS you people are determined ❤💀 I love it though, it really means alot that you guys are reading my stuff and liking it. I NEVER thought that it would come this far when I originally wrote this 5 weeks ago, so like I said before. Thank you, to every. Last. One. Of you. 🥰 you make my flat teenage boy bossom warm with love and appriciation. 

Okay 2nd...I sadly started school again and I won't be able to update like I used to😒 fuckass school. I usually avoid my schoolwork to the last possible degree until it becomes dire to my grades, (it's not a good system but it seems I have no fucks to give and cheating like a MUG is the glue holding my grade point average to a 3.5 so I am happy). However some good news, my brain doesn't shut up at 5 in the goddamn morning and I am usually hit with potential chapter ideas/drafts for my stories. This being said I'll be thinking about writing some new content for my fics while I slave away over dumbass irrelevant work. 

Lastly third, my writing style has changed significantly, believe it or not, over the past 6 days and everytime I read one of my stories it makes me want to gag on my shameful old writing style. Soooooo, with that in mind I'm probably at some point going to like Redo both Christmas Break and Do You See Me cuz whatever this 'I'm new to writing fanfiction please don't hate me UwU🥺👉👈' is **_NOT. IT._**

Anyways I really wanted to share this with you and let you guys know I am NOT done writing and have NO desire to cancel. I'm just putting everything I can into my upcoming fic, y'all are really gonna like it or be blown away by what I did with it😏

As always sorry for the inconvienance and being annoying❤ your love is keeping me going and in return y'all shall be rewarded dearly with something better than this display of insurbodinant waste 😒. I'll come back very soon from this _very_ brief little hiatus just let me get shit together will quick, i promise!!

-Void


	12. On The Go

Rick and Carl were scanning the aisles of sorted goods and cans and what have you on the descending shelves. Different produce of what seemed like an endless list of goods supplied them nicely. They were looking for canned peaches. 

If one could see the domesticity of Rick in that moment, they would see how much of a surburban dad he truly was. We're talking: squinting the atoms off a grocery list, while your teenage emo son has earbuds in and is having his own little mosh pit of Death Metal in the always sub zero freaking grocery store.

"Carl knock it off, you'll run into somethang'" Rick warned from behind his mask. Never looking up from his blind gaze he had on that innocent little paper.

Carl mocked him. "CoRaL. KnOcK iT oFF." 

"You gotta problem with'at?!" He snapped angrily, raising a brow in a manner that said 'Don't test me.'

Carl only rolled his eyes and turned his music louder to where Rick heard the demonic screeches of what you could only call 'Devil's Music.'

He drew his lips in a tight small frown and glared at his child before he turned back to the list. He scratched his face. This mask was itching and he couldn't for the life of him make out Negan's damn messy scribbling.

"Tha hell is this Negan?" He hissed to himself in complete annoyance. He didn't have the patience to care for that last item, it was Negan's fault he couldn't read his illegible sloppy handwriting, and it was going to be his fault to why Rick didn't grab it.

His fault entirely. 

"C'mon Carl" he said to the teen who was now nodding his head to the blaring music, again Rick found himself frowning at his son and began pushing the cart filled with all sorts of vegtables and fruits and other food necessities to the front of the store. Although the store was relatively crowded, it seemed to make up for space. 

Probably because of the tape on the ground indicating where people should stand in work of the safety guidelines and health codes due to the stupid pandemic...yeah probably because of that.

They were in line for the 5th checkout awaiting to be ringed up. After an old lady with silver aging hair and a hunch in her back finished the endless array of groceriesshe had present - to Rick's utter relief - and he pushed their cart in the little aisle filled with magazines and candy and gum. An older looking man who looked about in his mid 50's bald with little scruffy patch on his bald dome and a lurking cast to his blue eyes came to be their cashier. 

"Why hello gorgeous how are you?" -Rick looked at his blue apron and upon his nametag- Merle had asked.

"Fine." He gruffed out not wanting to talk to this man. He had started placing the groceries onto the conveyer belt. Carl had began helping taking out some of the things in the back of the cart.

"Well aren't you just pretty young coupla' things, ya got someone keepin' you warm tonight babyboy?" Rick looked at this man with pure disgust before surreal amounts of shock took over his face. Rick realized this man wasn't talking to him, he was...?! He was talking to Carl. 

Oh _HELL **NO.**_

Carl caught on to the fact that this sick fuck was gesturing to him and he moved himself behind his father in a silent absentminded plea of protection. Rick had took a couple of steps to shield his son completely from the man's predatory lingering eyes. His blood boiled and he was on the verge of seeing red.

"Shut your fuckin' mouth and bag my fuckin' items you piece of shit." Rick grimly pointed out. Carl could practically feel the lethality seeping out of his father traveling through waves onto his body. It was overwhelming and it turned the air around them tense. He could feel the scorching rage in his father and it was like a comfort blanket against the old man's bone chilling aura. 

The man chuckled a dry laugh, and Rick had almost lost to his rage if it weren't from his son's hands that placed themselves on the back of his brown fur leather vintage jacket. But then he did as he was told and bagged their items. 

After ringing up their total of $118.56 and paying, Rick turned back to the man and shit him a look that held the true meaning of death behind it.

"Don't you _ever_ talk to me or my son again you fucking bastard."

And with that they walked out of the car and made their way to the car.

"You okay?" He searched Carl's face after the boy had taken his mask off while at their vehicle. Carl took a deep breathe before turning to his dad. He was a littlr shaken up, it's not everyday you get hit on by a sexual predator, in a fucking grocery store.

"Yeah- yeah dad. I'm okay." He wasn't but he was trying at least. 

Rick just stared over him, trying to see if he was hurt, which he obviously wasn't but you couldn't tell that to his papa bear that resignated inside him.

"Don't worry son, he wouldn't have hurt you. No one will, you or Judy. Me and Negan'll make sure of it." He said reassuringly reaching over and squeezing his shoulder.

Carl nodded and forced himself to relax at his father's touch. He knew he was alright and that that old creep wasn't going to do anything.

"I know Dad." He said softly, he looked into those similar eyes of his and then pulled away after he felt he was safe.

* * *

After loading the backseat with the bags of groceries, and pulling out onto the main road, Rick began driving them away from the the town and towards the highway.

He looked over to Carl, who looked gassy for some reason.

"You gotta go to the John?" He inquired.

Carl shook his head. 

"Jus pre-driver jitters." He said.

"It's okay Carl, it's not that hard. I promise. Once you get behind this wheel you'll understand that it's not as scary as it may seem."

Carl flashed him a look of measured distaste. Drawing his lips tight and lidding his eyes halfway.

Rick laughed.

"I promise." He said again.

"I guess..."

They drove into an empty vacant parking lot, while off the exit of the road on a highway. From what it looked like, it seemed to be an abandoned hospital. Carl didn't know hospitals could be abadoned, a flare of enlightment filled him. 

The greeneey of nature stood out against the weathered beige cracked concrete foundation of the hospital. 

Rick stopped the car and unbuckled his seatbelt. He looked at his son. Carl simply looked back.

"You ready?"

Carl smiled "No"

Rick chuckled. 

"C'mon now." And with that they got out the car and switched sides. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was weirdly put together. My Bad. 
> 
> BUT HEY!! At least y'all got a chapter. 😘
> 
> -sorry, school's been a bitch to me.  
> BUT HERE YOU GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :]]]]]]]] <3
> 
> I know this is trash, and I am welcolming all flames in the comments. C'mon DRAG MY ASS. 🤗 i'm doing it to myself sweetie 😌


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